Thursday 7 November 2013

My Crazy Valentine

Some sing songs about their loved ones.  "My Boy Lollipop" and such like.  I blog mine.  I know Romance is the flavour of February 14th but why wait?  I wanted to reflect on Sustainable Relationships.  And I wanted to keep it real. Sustainable relationships - how do they look?  Different in each and every one of them!  Ours is about dialogue.  He taught me how to confront issues, I taught him that not every issue needs confronting. He taught me about World Religions and Politics.  I taught him about looking closely at small nature miracles and figuring out how things work. 

My Crazy Valentine.  We argue like cat and dog, play games like cat and mouse, sing songs together like Sonny and Cher and have a love story that spans nearly 3 decades (27 to be precise).  He likes chocolate, I like salty chips.  He likes reading, I like gardening.  He likes driving, I like staying.  He likes adventure, I like backyard stuff.  We're different, but we're same!  We both love saving the earth projects.  We love our home and garden, life and family.  We love music.  Lots of it, and different stuff from World to Rock.  

I do the cooking.  He makes the salad.  We both do dishes.  He turns the compost and mows the lawn.  I sow seeds and tend the seedlings.  He sorts the finances.  I do the fixing.  He plans holidays, I do the packing.

He's the Door to my World
My Own Garden-Hand Stud-Muffin-in-Boots
My Valentine.  When he is away from home, he calls EVERY night to connect.  When we come home, we sit and share a cuppa tea and the day's events.  I know him (sometimes  even better than he knows himself) and he knows me.  I have known him longer than I have not known him (more than half my life).  We discuss everything before we make decisions - not always without heated debate.  We have learned to not go to bed on an argument.  We have learned how to talk and more importantly, how to listen to one another.  We tease one another often and have fun together.  He writes poetry for me on birthdays and Valentine's Days. I have learned how to respond in a similiarly, less eloquent, amateur manner -ala-Dr. Seuss-kinda-kindy-rhyme.

He is the World at my Feet
He uses quiet reasoning in a debate, I swear a lot in the heat of the moment. He apologizes, I do not.  I meant what I said when I said it, 100%!  He won't let go of an idea, like a bulldog with a cat- scented rag in his mouth.  I detach easily.  He panics, I keep calm and reflective.  I'm the yin to his yang.  And vice versa.  He organizes little surprises for me.  A night away.  The pimping of my car.  Thoughtful things.  I do his laundry and create his culinary delights.

Our Pool of Love


He gives me Wings to Fly
We're our greatest critics and supporters.  We level each other like a backhoe and praise one another like a gospel choir. We appreciate what it takes to make a relationship work - HARD FRIGGIN' WORK!!  When asked by our children, how they will know when the "right" one comes along, I pragmatically claim that it is not so much about the "right one" and much more about working it out.   We work hard together.  We each have our own whackiness. When the world sniggers at us, I get him and he gets me.  That's all that counts.  Get it?

Here's a poem he wrote for Valentine's Day, a couple of years ago:

Despite Me
Even though I forget where I put my keys
I know
I can never forget
The wonder
of you.

Even though I am losing my marbles
I know
I can never lose
the fever
When I look at you.

Even though
I drop food on my shirt
I know
You are 
Drop dead gorgeous. 

Even though
I dribble when I play the drums (courtesy of Jamie Oliver)
I know
I still love
To make music
with you.

Even though
I don't make sense sometimes
I know
I still love
to hold you.

Even though
I am me and you are you
I know I love it when you do,
When I hold you and you hold me
Kiss me and love me like you do.

Be Mine.

He's the Water to my Lotus Flower
Here's this birthday one from some ways back:

A Birthday Wish

For the one I love a special wish,
Just turned 40 and, wow, what a dish.
The years roll by like words in a song,
Whilst you remain forever young.
Fly in sumptuous colour, gossamer wing,
When I think of your radiant splendour, it makes me sing.
And when I am in the room with you,
You bring sparkling magic to every view. 
Enjoy the wonderful years that await,
Have a glorious birthday and be my date.

And there is a whole drawer full of such memories.  My wish is that others will reflect on their own Crazy Valentine and cherish the memories you are creating together.  This is what sustains us.  Sustainable Relationships.

He's the Krishna to my Radha
PS.  I okay-ed this with My Valentine, before posting.

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